home for christmas

Emily and I are staying in LA for Christmas this year, mainly because we couldn’t purchase tickets for before Christmas due to Emily’s work schedule and the price of tickets going out of LA the night before the sleigh touches down.  At first glance this could be a sad occasion, and of course on the one hand it is sad to not be with our families for Christmas eve and Christmas day – after all this may be the most important part of the holiday a part from the very catastrophic event that motivates this celebration.

But then again – we, or at least I, and very happy to have the day to ourselves.  Growing up I have had the disadvantage of never being in once place on for the holidays.  I switched Christmas eve and Christmas day every year between my mom’s house and my dad’s.  Christmas for me has always been a something characterized by rushing around, and juggling.  I think that this also kept me from every really experiencing certain traditions, my family was always pre-pared to have me leave and go to the other – I could never settle either.

Then when Emily and I got married, we added two more families to the mix.  I love the richness of so many families and loved ones, I would never trade them for the world, but this year I look forward to silence — this after all may be our only year to ourselves.  And so we are taking it slow – cherishing our time together, we have planned a wonderful Christmas dinner, and are planning on working on our letter’s to one another tomorrow as part of our day together.

All in all – the day will be a day of rest.  Maybe this is what it was meant to be, maybe not, but for this time around we’ll try something different.

Of course in this — preparing for rest, that hole is felt, the hole where family would fill.  I began thinking about our friends here, most of whom are from someplace else.  And thought about California Natives that we know – those who we might try and spend time with if we desired too.  In this moment I realized that for one year – this is sufficient but for all times this would not work so well.  We are geared for family and friends.

We are fortunate to have Chase, Kate and baby Wren come over for Christmas Eve breakfast tonight with us and share in the breaking of bread.  Their presence will make it feel much more warm and Christmassy…

What Goes On – Sufjan Stevens from the album “This Bird Has Flown: A 40th Anniversary Tribute to The Beatles’ Rubber Soul” by Various Artists – Razor & Tie

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