I love this whole meditation on life and the sympathy from Anthony de Mello but this line in particular continues to ring in my heart.
…You will no longer say to your friend, “How happy you have made me.” For in so saying you flatter his ego and manipulate him into wanting to please you again. And you give yourself the illusion that your happiness depends on your friend. “Rather you will say, “When you and I met, happiness arose.”
Source: Call to Love – Meditations by Anthony de Mello SJ: Meditation 10 – Life is a symphony